Rereading a book after a period of time makes it a very differnet book.
Always, always negotiate to get what is fair.
Jealousy & fear can lead to a lot of pain and mistrust. One way or another, I must internalize two things.
I have chosen to put my full trust in Asha, and I have never caught her breaking it. While it is definitely possible that she does break my trust without me knowing, for reasons I don’t understand… thinking like that will drive me mad and surely end our relationship. I am left with but one reasonable option: trust her, and find comfort in that trust.
I do not need Asha. I want her almost desperately. My life would be worse off without her. But I do not need her. She supports my work, is a source of my comfort and emotional warmth, allows me to koo, ensures my sex life is excellent, is adventurous and philosophical… she is excellent for me. But to allow these facts to make me cling too tightly to her will simply harm us and handicap me. I must be able to walk alone, even with her. Take deep pleasure and comfort in her presence, but not rely upon it too often.
Bring in interesting and inspiring ‘fuel’ for my mind, and I will be compelled to produce interesting and inspiring work. If creativity is shit, this is food.
I have to weigh my actions by my own scale. Other’s believing different than me can be listened to, but it must always come down to my own judgment on myself.
I must never again allow my lesser self to take control of my actions. When I do what my highest self does not want to do, I don’t fully enjoy it, and I often steal enjoyment from my future in the process. It is almost fully self-destructive. To do what I most desire, in my highest self, leads me to the highest enjoyment in the moment & an enjoyment that serves to build the foundation for an increased future enjoyment. As I go, my enjoyment will grow exponentially, built on the base of past actions and building the base of future actions.
Polyamory takes a LOT more work than monogamy. The increase in relationships, paired with humanity’s relative inexperience in the realm, leads to a TON of turmoil. If ever Asha and I decide to really look into it (possible, as it has a lot of benefits), we will have to be very solid together and able to survive & thrive in just about any environment.
Seeking to always improve in every way (posture, kegles, writing faster, creating ambiance, etc.) is an enjoyable habit to form.
No one really know anything, and all I can truly know is that I know nothing & that the few things I have strong hunches on are things that must be proven by my own experimentation & nothing else.
Asha is doing her best, as am I. When she tries to make me talk about everything, when she wants to cuddle when I want to work, when she does all of that stuff out of love for me and a desire for the most enjoyment in our relationship. If I feel that she is making me do things I don’t want to, I simply have to correct the course of things.
I learned more about how to analyze a website funnel. Really, once you gather the data, the advice it gives is quite blaring and self-apparent.
I learned about using the Why game to break down pretty much anything.
There is nothing to lose by writing a post. There is no reputation to be damaged, no audience to fail, nothing. There is only the chance of an excellent post, or the choice of no post.