What I Learned This Week (Nov 2 – 8, 2015)

 

What I Learned This Week (Nov 2 - 8, 2015)

  • It feels good, sometimes, to not have a bunch of thoughts and plans and to just feel emotion.
  • Rereading a book after a period of time makes it a very differnet book.
  • Planning a year takes little more than a day or two.
  • Always, always negotiate to get what is fair.
  • Jealousy & fear can lead to a lot of pain and mistrust. One way or another, I must internalize two things.
    1. I have chosen to put my full trust in Asha, and I have never caught her breaking it. While it is definitely possible that she does break my trust without me knowing, for reasons I don’t understand… thinking like that will drive me mad and surely end our relationship. I am left with but one reasonable option: trust her, and find comfort in that trust.
    2. I do not need Asha. I want her almost desperately. My life would be worse off without her. But I do not need her. She supports my work, is a source of my comfort and emotional warmth, allows me to koo, ensures my sex life is excellent, is adventerous and philosophical… she is excellent for me. But to allow these facts to make me cling too tightly to her will simply harm us and handicap me. I must be able to walk alone, even with her. Take deep pleasure and comfort in her presence, but not rely upon it too often.
  • Bring in interesting and inspiring ‘fuel’ for my mind, and I will be compelled to produce interesting and inspiring work. If creativity is shit, this is food.

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